School, family troubles making me feel panicked

Discussion in 'General Chit-Chat' started by OldFashionedMama, Aug 22, 2010.

  1. OldFashionedMama

    OldFashionedMama Partyin' like it's 1699

    School starts tomorrow. For those who don't know, I am working towards my degree in violin performance. Last semester ended in disaster, and I have to re-take a class and give a recital that was supposed to be given this past spring. I am terrified of not making it through that class. I will have a different professor, who interestingly enough is the girlfriend of a professor I had before. Hopefully they will both be able to help me get through this.

    My grandmother has been in the hospital for 17 days and counting. She had to have major surgery for a bowel obstruction at the age of 83. Her kidneys still aren't working properly, otherwise she'd be out of there and on her way to rehab. I told her she has to get better so she can come to my recital-which makes me feel even worse because I should have just sucked it up and gave it when I was supposed to. My grandma is full-blooded Romanian, and since I am performing Bela Bartok's Romanian Folk Dances on this recital, I REALLY want her to be there because she loves them. The first time she heard them, she told me I needed to go to the local Romanian festival because they have people there who perform traditional dances. Unfortunately that was two years ago, and the festival has been cancelled for this year.

    My parents are still having serious financial problems. My dad was supposed to come to the boys' birthday party and when he didn't show up I was very concerned-he didn't even call us-very unlike him. It took me a long time to get ahold of him, and while he did not come straight out and say it, I suspect that he did not have the gas money or even money to get presents and that's why he didn't come. He injured his shoulder and now the doctor says the only way to fix it is surgery, which would put him out of work for several months. He told me he was trying to sell stuff "because he didn't need it anymore", which I also think was BS. I think he's preparing for the event that he can't work for a while.

    We're still in limbo with this house, and I'm freaked out because they're doing FHA again and we got turned down for that before. FHA requirements are nearly impossible to meet.

    Sigh. :(
  2. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    Wow, OFM, you have quite a load right now. I hope your grandmother's recovery speeds up and she's able to attend your recital. I'm sure it would mean a lot to her to do so. Romanian Folk Dances, that sounds wonderful! I wish I could be there too!

    When you play the recital, just immerse yourself in thoughts of your Grandma, and don't even think about the room you're in. I know that's easier to say than to do!

    I hope things improve for your Dad. It must have been hard on him to miss his grandchild's birthday. We've been too broke to buy birthday presents for our grandsons before and it's a sheepish and awful feeling. Any chance of another opinion on the shoulder? I know shoulders are tricky, but would therapy and herbs help? Or would he consider such a thing?

    Hang in there, girl! My thoughts and prayers will be with you! Good luck at school!

  3. OldFashionedMama

    OldFashionedMama Partyin' like it's 1699

    Dad has a few options-A: Do nothing and suffer, B: Major surgery, requiring 4-8 months off work, C: "micro surgery" ( I dont know what that means) and be off 2-3 months. Chiropractic and physical therapy has done nothing to help his situation. My stepmom also suffers from an undiagnosed chronic pain condition. It's not fibromyalgia, they have no clue what is wrong with her. The narcotics just don't work anymore. I wish both of them could try "herbs" because I know they would be more effective for pain, but both of them work in jobs that do drug testing. I have no problem with people using MJ for medical reasons, especially when I know it would dramatically change their quality of life.
  4. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    Well, I wish them both well. We never had insurance as our kids were growing up. I made tons of poultices of arnica for bruises, comfrey & horsetail for my broken wrist (which they said I'd never have use of without surgery. No surgery, and I did "therapy" exercises myself plus the herbs, wrist has full function. I realize that might not be the case for everyone, I just got lucky), St. John's wort with comfrey and plantain to heal a slowly-healing sore, etc. We have a son-in-law on MJ for a bad injury to his back on a construction job. It's the only thing that helps. The prescriptiong drugs didn't work and had a host of side effects.

    Sometimes the only option is surgery. I hope your Dad checks into the "micro surgery" before he has major surgery. There have been times we ended up in a doctor's office, then had to work out monthly payments. Hard to pay, sometimes, when you have to be off work while recovering.

    I was hoping you'd say something like "Oh, I'll post a video (or audio) link to me playing those Romanian Folk Dances!" I love that kind of music! I browse stuff like that on youtube! Violin has to be the most lovely-sounding and versatile instrument!

    When my 20-year old son gets annoying with his music I turn up the volume on my computer, go to youtube, and search "accordian music". Makes him go away! lol
  5. OldFashionedMama

    OldFashionedMama Partyin' like it's 1699

    LOL accordian music! The only accordian player I've ever heard is Weird Al Yankovic. His spoof of Queen's "Another one bites the dust" (Another One Rides the Bus) is hilarious LOL!!!

    Here's a link to an awesome performance of the dances. Janine Jansen is HUGE in Europe, hardly anyone knows about her over here.

    [ame=]YouTube - Bartok: Romanian Dances[/ame]

    1. Jocul cu bata -Stick Dance
    2. Braul- Waistband Dance/ Peasant Dance
    3. Pe Loc-Standing Still or literally "In One Spot"
    4. Buciumeana- Horn Dance (my favorite of the dances)
    5. Poarga Romaneasca- Romanian Polka
    6. Maruntel- Quick Dance

    The dance titles are not properly spelled, as I have no idea how to type in all the little markings. I thought I knew a little about pronunciation until we played at a Hungarian church recently. The organist spoke both Romanian and Hungarian fluently...whoa was I waaaay off LOL!
  6. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    Thanks, OFM, I'll enjoy this...but after I get some sleep! Been out with family all aternoon and eveniing and now it's late. I appreciate you posting this! Can't wait to listen to it!
  7. mdprepper

    mdprepper I sold my soul to The_Blob. He had candy...

    OFM, I pray all goes well with your Grandmom and Dad. I have NO abilities when it comes to music (I can play a Radio, but that is it!), so no advice there. Romanian music is beautiful and the dancing is breath taking.

    My Babika (we called her Baba) was first generation American, her family was from Romania. Her father insisted that the kids learn English as their first language, but spoke Romanian and Hungarian in the home also. Baba learned both but could not distinguish which words were from which language! Unfortunately, the only words we learned were the cuss words (Baba would cuss in the other languages to keep us from understanding what she was saying so that was all we ever heard in the languages)

    Now that Baba is gone my sisters and I are trying to learn the language, culture, everything we can, to make sure our kids know the rich history and wonderful people that they come from.
  8. Jason

    Jason I am a little teapot

    OFM, you have my thoughts and prayers. Sounds like a hell of a pinch, but you're surviving day by day and you and your family will prevail in the end. Hang in there!
  9. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    You're still in my thoughts and prayers, OFM. My sister is here from "urban back east" this week, first time visiting me out here in Montana, and we've been busy seeing the sights, so I haven't been on here as much the last few days. I miss you all! Keep hanging in there, OFM!
  10. Diego2112

    Diego2112 Well-Known Member

    Here's to hoping all goes well with ya! I can sympathise whole heartedly with your situation.

    As some advice: I had the "micro surgury" done on my left shoulder years ago, DONT LET YOUR FATHER DO IT! Screwed me up ROYAL, and it STILL hurts day in day out. I've found rest is the best thing for it, and a hot shower, as hot as he can stand it, and then some! :)

    Good luck with your music, music is life, remember that! :D

    Take care,
  11. hardrock

    hardrock Well-Known Member

    OFM,I had to chuckle with your music major. It's the same as my wife's.
    She did double reeds and her anxiety level was the same as yours. Just will pass.

    Your situation is very,very similar to ours. I will pray for you and your family
    and ask for your prayers.
  12. OldFashionedMama

    OldFashionedMama Partyin' like it's 1699

    :shtf: Now my parents are possibly going to lose their house. They almost lost it a year ago but were able to get back on track....and now they're in the hole again. My stepmom and sister left today for the Glenn Beck rally in DC. (a trip they planned, thankfully, before :shtf: )

    I knew there were issues, that things didn't seem right with them. My dad would never disclose it to me, but stepmom told me everything today. There really isn't anything I can do.

    In good news, grandma is finally out of the hospital and starting rehab at a nursing home. Apparently she is doing well and is happy there.
  13. NaeKid

    NaeKid YourAdministrator, eh?

    Are your parental-units able to sell it off and "down-size" or "right-size" their living situation so that they can stabilize again before the banks (or similar institution) ruin things for them?
  14. OldFashionedMama

    OldFashionedMama Partyin' like it's 1699

    When it rains it pours. She didn't go to the rally because she got a stomach bug! I talked to my dad. He isn't even gonna worry. He will ride it out like last time. I guess he is more optimistic, he doesn't let the thought of losing the family homestead even enter his mind.