The Texas Work Force Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help,and sent an agent out to interview him. "I need a list of your employees, and how much you pay them," demanded the agent. "Well," drawled the rancher, "there's my farm hand, who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $150 per week, plus free room and board. And then there's the half-wit. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally." "That's the guy I want to talk to.. to the half-wit," said the agent. The rancher replied, "That would be me."