I was a bad boy......

Discussion in 'General Chit-Chat' started by RoadRash, Oct 24, 2010.

  1. RoadRash

    RoadRash Member

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    I have an aquintance who should be wearing a tin foil hat, just for fun the other day I pointed out him that it appeared that several people where writing down his lic plate number ..... Did u see that, he turns head u missed it.
    Oh well I had a little fun that day........
    L8R RR
     
  2. backlash

    backlash Well-Known Member

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    You are as bad as the guy that carries a small bottle of used motor oil so he can squirt it under parked Harley's.:D
     

  3. SurviveNthrive

    SurviveNthrive a dude

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    heck, all you gotta do is nudge them.
     
  4. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    You guys are great! I'm still laughing!

    Maybe this is a good thread for us to post the best practical "prep-related" joke or prank we've ever played on someone!

    Mine tend to be along the line of trying to convince guests that the weird-tasting meat they're eating really IS road kill, but it's okay, it was still warm! Funny how even beef can taste like "raccoon" if you plant the idea in someone's head!
     
  5. RoadRash

    RoadRash Member

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    Done it and been done too, also try a little bit of rice under the jap bikes,,,, LOL
    Pulled one better friend with a 1974 custom shovel kick only... lifted plug just enough not to make contact watched him kick it 41 times ...... Then I told him I could start it he was huffing n puffin did not see me push plug wires down second kick it started .....
     
  6. RoadRash

    RoadRash Member

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    Tooo Funnny love it
     
  7. The_Blob

    The_Blob performing monkey

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    what's wrong with roadkill? :confused: :D
     
  8. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    Nothing...as long as you're not humming that oldie-but-goodie, "Dead Skunk in the middle of the road, stinking to high heavens...la la la" while you're gutting and skinning your roadkill! :lolsmash:
     
  9. ZoomZoom

    ZoomZoom Rookie Prepper

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    I like to say we have a 30-degree rule around here.

    It's fun when you drive with others, who aren't from the area or aren't as rural. We'll be driving down the road (and if I'm driving, I slow down so as to appear I'm taking a real close look), when I spot a roadkill.
    I'll ask "Does that look like less then 30-degrees to you?".
    They say "What on earth are you talking about?".
    I'll say "Look at the legs on the roadkill? Are they sticking up more then 30-degrees?".
    They say "How the hell do I know, and why would that matter?".
    I'll say "If the legs are sticking up less then 30-degrees, the rigamortis isn't that bad and we have dinner for tonight! Got room in the back for it?".
     
  10. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    :2thumb: :lolsmash:
     
  11. HarleyRider

    HarleyRider Comic Relief Member

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    NOT MY HARLEY!!!! :mad:

    Built in 1987 and never leaked one single drop of oil. You must be talking about one of those Japanese rice-burners. ;)
     
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2010
  12. HarleyRider

    HarleyRider Comic Relief Member

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    Ain't nothin' wrong with a good ole' road kill. Heck, the tire passin' over just tenderizes 'em up a bit and cracks up some of the bones to make suckin' out the marrow a little bit easier. Works really great on a turtle when you are tryin' to make some Cooter Pie. :eek: :D
     
  13. HarleyRider

    HarleyRider Comic Relief Member

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    Run for the hills, Gypsysue, I feel a song coming on.... :eek:


    I'm drivin' my pickup truck
    I'm feelin' mean and I'm getting drunk
    I drive all over town
    Find a little critter and I run it down
    Hit the brights and watch 'em freeze
    Turn a little animal into head-cheese

    Oh, it's roadkill
    Drivin' around in my automobile
    For roadkill
    Ain't gonna stop 'til I get my fill

    Out there by the side of the road
    Might be a bunny or maybe a toad
    It's guts are hanging out
    Only one eye and part of a snout
    I still don't think it's dead
    Put it in reverse and squish it's head

    Oh, it's roadkill
    Drivin' around in my automobile
    For roadkill
    Climb out of the cab and hand me a drill
    Roadkill
    Ain't gonna pay their hospital bills
    Roadkill
    Kill a little critter just to get my thrill

    Are you gonna run 'em down right now?
    Yeah, I'm gonna run 'em down right now

    If you drive 405
    You won't find anything left alive
    Suckin' suds while I'm makin' time
    Squashin' little animals flat as a dime
    These critters don't have a prayer
    I just ran over Smokey the Bear

    Now he's roadkill
    Drivin' around in my automobile
    For roadkill
    Climb out of the cab and hand me a drill
    Roadkill
    Ain't gonna pay their hospital bills
    Roadkill
    Kill a little critter just to get my thrill

    I love roadkill

    Hit the lights
    Squeeze 'em in my sights
    Somebody's pet gonna need a vet
    Ran one over but he ain't dead yet
    This truck's a killin' machine
    Pedal to the metal and I'm feelin' free
    Somebody's kitty's gonna need a hysterectomy

    I love roadkill :eek::eek::eek: :D

    (from "Dickies" album).
     
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2010
  14. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    Harley!!!!! Yeah... Good thing I don't know the tune to that song! No chance of accidently singing it out loud around other people! lol

    I have a couple of friends who have been laid off a while that pick up road kill and boil it down for their dogs. Can't fault them for that, I'd do it too. When MMM thins out the gophers (which are actually Columbian Ground squirrels, similar to prairie dogs but everyone calls them gophers) we boil them in a kettle designated for dog food. They can carry plague, so we don't feed it to them raw, even though lord knows what they kill and eat on their own.

    When moose and elk are hit on the highway it's taken to the senior center or the food bank and used for people food.
     
  15. HarleyRider

    HarleyRider Comic Relief Member

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    Hey Gypsy... how about this one. Sound familiar??

    99 gophers and elk by the wall,
    99 gophers and elk;
    One goes down,
    Gets squashed on the ground,
    98 gophers and elk by the wall.

    98 gophers and elk by the wall,
    98 gophers and elk;
    One goes down,
    Gets squashed on the ground,
    97 gophers and elk by the wall.

    etc..... ad nauseum. :gaah: :D
     
  16. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    Oh, come on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll have that in my head the rest of the day! I know the tune to THAT song! :D
     
  17. RoadRash

    RoadRash Member

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    Then not riddn enough to vibrate bolts lose.......LOL

    Had a good laugh earlier this year was takin the MC instructor course one of the other guys in class comes in wearn evrything HD askn evryone what they ride after they finished he said well one day u can get ur harley....
    Comes to me askd what I ride 750 shadow he states that its a little bike I say do not intterup also a 01 1500 intruder he states u like the jap stuff again I say don't interrup 95 fat boy he says at least u have an HD again don't intterup I also have an 85 custom with a 80 shovel 30 over what have u got I say he states a its his 1st bike
    VROD OH a porsche harley ..........Didnt harley try that in the 60'n 70's good luck with it. Not so nice but alwfull funny

    Its not leakn oil just markn territory ......
     
  18. RoadRash

    RoadRash Member

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    Crossin' the highway late last night
    He shoulda looked left and he shoulda looked right
    He didn't see the station wagon car
    The skunk got squashed and there you are!

    You got yer
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Stinkin' to high Heaven!

    Take a whiff on me, that ain't no rose!
    Roll up yer window and hold yer nose
    You don't have to look and you don't have to see
    'Cause you can feel it in your olfactory

    You got yer
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Stinkin' to high Heaven!

    Yeah you got yer dead cat and you got yer dead dog
    On a moonlight night you got yer dead toad frog
    Got yer dead rabbit and yer dead raccoon
    The blood and the guts they're gonna make you swoon!
    You got yer
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Stinkin' to high Heaven!

    C'mon stink!

    You got it!
    It's dead, it's in the middle
    Dead skunk in the middle!
    Dead skunk in the middle of the road
    Stinkin' to high heaven!
    All over the road, technicolor man!
    Oh, you got pollution
    It's dead, it's in the middle
    And it's stinkin' to high, high Heaven
     
  19. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

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    Oh yeah, Harley! I can sing along with THAT one! Still remembered most of the words!

    Thanks! I'm smiling a mile wide!

    :D
     
  20. Bigdog57

    Bigdog57 Adventurer at large

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    Speaking of "Jap Bikes", me and a bunch of buddies ride the KLR650 Dual Sport single - they aren't called "thumpers" for nuttin! Fasteners always coming loose. Our favorite saying - "Loctite is our friend!" :)

    One way to totally mess with a KLRista's mind is to slyly drop a couple spare bolts under his parked bike...... He'll spend the next half hour looking for the holes they came out of...... :2thumb:

    I'm generally a fairly serious sort of guy, but I like a good joke. Every once in a while I get somebody on the old "Henway" joke...... :D