***This is not meant to insult or offend anyone. It's just my own personal reflection on current events in my life.*** I did at one point identify as a Christian, and to some degree I still do-in the sense that I believe in Jesus Christ, I believe he was a holy man, I believe in his teachings-I just don't believe that the Christian Bible is the only true "word". Regardless, I have many devout Christian friends and acquaintances. Only one of them routinely evangelizes to us, and he's DH's coworker so I don't have to hear it very often (unless he calls us at 11pm at night shrieking into the telephone that his 3yo son is acting "sinful" because he plays with his pee pee like all 3yo boys do-Yes this was a real phone call ) There is one group of people that really gets to me, and oddly enough it is a group of professors at my music school! They all go to the same church, they even have a weekly bible study at school (this is a public university-not a religious, private one. No one has a problem with it though, which is nice. I'm glad they can have their meetings.) My problem with them is the fakery. One of the professors can be downright nasty to everyone-he'll actually stick his nose up and look over your head when he's talking to you. All of them are rather clique-y, which is not good when our school has been struggling to keep new professors. The turnover has been high in recent years. We lost an amazing music history professor, had a PhD from Berkeley and played the harpsichord better than, like, anyone. He told us when he made the decision to leave that he "didn't feel welcome here." Okay-enough about them. They drive me nuts.. Any time my husband and I have had financial problems, my mother in law tells us we should go to church. :confused: She goes to church every Sunday, just as she always has, but even her actions don't seem to reflect her supposed religious devotion. She's practically admitted the only reason she attends is for the social benefits. I forget the name of it, but she attends the big Episcopal church in downtown Miami, Florida. We went with her once for their Christmas service....BIG money in this church. Then she was on a rant about us getting the children baptised. My husband and I do not believe in the practice and don't really see the point in it, as we do not adhere to any particular religion. She also cannot accept that her son no longer follows the religion he was raised in and hasn't for many years. (My father in law is a retired Episcopal priest.) So perhaps this has something to do with it... To make a LONG story short, I don't go to church anymore. I've had so many bad experiences, most of the worst ones I did not mention here. I am not happy with this, and I wish I could find a place where I felt comfortable. We have a Unitarian church here, but again I dont know... I'm afraid to go anywhere now! I'm not completely Christian, I'm not completely Pagan either, I just believe what I believe-but it seems like you have to follow "their" beliefs if you decide to join a church or other group. Anyway.... I'm not :nuts: really. I've been kind of down about the whole situation for too long, and I guess I'm just looking for advice or commiseration. If you made it this far, thanks for reading.