Harsh or realistic perspectives?

Discussion in 'General Preparedness Discussion' started by SurviveNthrive, Dec 1, 2010.

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  1. SurviveNthrive

    SurviveNthrive a dude

    I, along some I assume some others, through life experiences and observations adopted some views which might appear harsh and cynical, but are actually good guidelines to understanding and avoiding destructive behaviors and situations for me. I life and survivalism I strongly believe in individual responsibility, and that many problems experienced in life by others are easily avoided, and many threats to others are simple things to avoid if one simply thinks things through and responds appropriately.

    Some might disagree, but these work for me:

    1. No good deed goes unpunished.

    I'm sure some have seen this time after time, you gou out of your way to help someone truly in need, often a person seeking help, and it blows back on you in some way. Perhaps a continuation and extension of that help is sought, or the person complains about what was received. There are times when you extend a hand and know that this is going to cause a problem down the road. Great example: When a church group opens up their doors to the homeless and church members find themselves harassed and the neighbors suffer thefts and damage! We still do things to help strangers, but expect problems.

    In very bad case scenario Survivalism, if we give out food to any strangers and word gets out, you're going to be swarmed, so no good deed goes unpunished.

    2. She picked him. (or He picked her.)

    Half of the population is of one gender and half is of the other. There are many reasons people pick their spouses. That's their business, but when something goes wrong, the 'victim' expects sympathy and assistance. For example, everyone warned Sue about Ken being controlling, and there were warning signs for abuse, but she didn't listen to anyone and now look what happened. Or Rick knew he picked up Kim in a bar, had sex with her in the men's bathroom that first night, and he thought she'd be a faithful wife? An extreme example here, a woman brings home a man she meets in church that she knows was released from prison for a sex offense so he can have a place to live and so she can have someone. He rapes and kills her daughter, a popular high school cheerleader. The mother blames others, but She picked him.

    For preparedness: Be careful who you let into your group and be wary of their boyfriends or girlfriends. Some folks will bring horrifically bad choices into their lives and everyone else's and others will also pay a price for their poor life choices. Male or female shack up causes big problems, and your friend or relative complains about the piece of trash they hooked up with. Well, she picked him. Or He picked her.

    3. Where's the surprise?

    I believe that many outcomes are highly predictable, as in the She picked him/He picked her situation, or when people do stupid things and the inevitable occurs. So when making a decision and you know that if you choose to go somewhere or with someone and something bad is like to happen and others will say Where's the Surprise? You don't do it! One of the harsh examples: Quite a while ago a lovely, sweet petite young woman goes to Africa and then out into the bush alone, with lots of expensive camera gear to pursue her dream of photographing the animals. She's raped, robbed, and killed by the game wardens who can't believe what landed in their lap and weren't going to let the opportunity pass by. Flash cash when hanging with trash, and you're likely to have problems. Where's the surprise?

    For survivalism, an example would be those people who live in the flood plains where it's been flooded year after year, after year...and they get flooded and act all shocked and perplexed for the cameras. Where's the surprise?

    4. Not my people!

    This one is less direct. Every now and then something horrific happens, some guy gets trampled by human debris who don't care about him but want their bargains. A person is injured and others walk past her on the street and no one pays attention except for the guy who steals her purse. The media pundits what to claim that this is representative of humanity.

    BullSh*t! Not my people. That didn't happen around me or people like me. We help, we're not like that. I don't accept that all of humanity is like that and I want to be as far away from human debris like that. This isn't about race or demographics, it's about places where the people of any race and/or social economic group belong to a repugnant culture that is very different from that of decent people. Talking to a guy who was in Mississippi in an area trashed by Katrina, I asked him if they'd a lot of looting there. "Not my people." The population there was largely black with some whites, mostly poor, but unlike New Orleans, his community had few looters and a whole lot of pulling together, so this isn't about race, need or economics, it's about what the people are like.

    In my preps, I ensure that I'm not living in areas where people are like that and that means avoiding known places, here's one famous example:

    Murder of Kitty Genovese - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    Even though there's a price to be paid for helping, how hard is it to pick up the phone. As we get older, and if you're aware, you see things and either react or don't react. These people who listened to the long duration attacks of not just one but of two women and didn't even get on the phone I can proudly say are 'not my people!'

    This is a short list, what it means to me is we bear an indvidual responsibility for what happens to us to a great extent. We've got to be careful about asking our motivations on helping folks and why they need that help because you might merely be facilitating more behavior that created the problem. You need to choose spouses and significant others carefully. You should think about things and if it's very possible that something might go wrong, and it's not a surprise if it does, don't do it! And don't live around human debris.
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2010
  2. sinbad

    sinbad Well-Known Member

    I mostly agree with you but have to be reluctant on No.1

    We do help even when we know of the coming punishment ( %&^$%&$%)
    Life sucks.

    However, I agree and try to educate my kids of the limits of helping others. Sometimes they listen and sometimes they don't. One example was when a girl called my daughter asking for specific book. I have always told them to be sure : either we have another copy, or we can buy another copy for freinds, or copy the few pages in need. Daughter thinks daddy is imposing "harsh" rules. She lends the book. And the other girl instead of returning it with thanks tells others and LENDS it to another girl, and it disapears.

    Oh, yea I was mad like anything when I was asked later : Dad, I need that book for a coming test.. it was only then she told me how it was lost. But being the dad that I am, I couln't blast her when she was having a test coming, and had to run and find another one.

    I reluctantly agree with you on No.1
    People laugh at you for your preps or wisdom, and then come back like pests (sorry to say) and bug you for the same thing they have laughed at you for.

    As a "corrective measure" on my side, I have scaled down the preps "on me" and followed a system of chaching stuff around, so I don't lie when I say ( I am not carrying this or that ), which is TRUE, but it may be stored in a locker a few meters away.

    I think that a rule like number one should not be misunderstood for a "harsh" attitude. We can use it to set a realistic strategy that accomodates our brain wisdom and hearts feelings. So, if someone needs help I must assume that my helping money, time, or effort may be lost in thin air, or worse be rewarded negatively.

    So, ask yourself about the possibilities. And all us preppers should be experienced in anlayzing (what if) scenarios. IF the helpless victim does not return that $50 next week, are you OK with that ?? See how you can live with such consequences. IF you can, very well. Keep on helping folks . If you can't handle, tolerate, or ignore the negative waves coming at you, it is better to listen to the computer within your skull.

    In our area, we have a very sobering story. One gentleman served in charities and social establishments for 20 years. his time and money were dedicated for the community to - perhaps - a level that was frustrating to his own family. Three months ago, he particpated in a meeting with a controversial character. His participation was seen as a huge mistake , and he was blasted to smitherene in many local forums.

    He was shocked by the attacks so much , he realized what he did all these years was blown aways by one "mistake" ( if it was indeed a mistrake) . So disappointed he was, he resigned from all his social activities and decided to isolate him self at home.

    He was a good guy.
    No, he was a GREAT guy.
    But he wasn't aware of your rule no. 1

    Thanks SurviveNthrive
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2010

  3. PopPop

    PopPop Well-Known Member

    No surprises here. We live in a society of entitlement and victomhood. We do not hold people responsible, we accept murder, rape, theivery. We do not respect private property. We have allowed the least of us to set the standards for our society and made a mockery of justice. If you have it and I need it or just want it, I will take it and probably get a bunch of politicians to pass a law to make it OK.

    Example: If someone goes to Med school and spends the 10 to 15 years and incredible amount of money to become a doctor, our society believes that we can demand that doctors knowledge and services as a personal right. We as a society have embraced the concept that everyone has a right to housing, regardless of their ability to pay for it. and we also believe that a person has a right to food regardless of their willingness to work for it. These 3 things supported by Federal laws and regulations have established the entitlement rights of those who could but will not. This philosophy has replaced the only true rights of Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. Any society that makes this bargain is doomed to consume itself, hence the situations you have cited and the decline of the USA.
  4. The_Blob

    The_Blob performing monkey

    If you loan a friend $50 and you never see them again, do you think that was the best $50 you ever spent?
  5. SaskBound

    SaskBound Well-Known Member

    So, you've never made a mistake? Never been surprised by the actions of another person who you thought you knew well? And that "not MY people" thing - how well do you know each and every one of your neighbors? How, exactly, are you picking "MY people"?

    While I agree that people are not all nice, that we can't save everybody (nor should we, necessarily), that we need to prepare for bad things happening (including an appropriate stash of weapons and ammo), should have basic situational awareness and not be overly trusting, etc - BUT I really get sick of the self-righteous attitude. And saying that no good deed goes unpunished is basically an excuse to be selfish. Exercising some basic situational awareness / good judgement is generally sufficient in 'normal' times. I actually agree with some of the underlying thoughts / premises, but the arrogance in this post really turns me off.
  6. Emerald

    Emerald Well-Known Member

    :congrat:Great Post! :2thumb:
  7. tortminder

    tortminder Well-Known Member

    I sometimes find SurviveNThrive a bit "blunt", but I generally find that he/she is at least honest in postings.

    A few specific responses to this exchange from my point of view;

    1. "No good deed goes unpunished".
    Obviously "some" good deeds are not punished, but as the OP points out, we live in a victim/entitlement society, (mostly found in the larger urban areas... small town and country folk still have courtesy and manners for the most part). Perhaps the OP, (as I have personally experienced), has found that more often than not the 'good deed" leads not to a positive conclusion, but, in the very least, a sense of "this wasn't enough" by the recipient(s). Your mileage may vary.

    2. "He/She chose him/her"/"So, you've never made a mistake".
    In my experience, most of the time when I have "made a mistake" regarding expectations of others, it was not a mistake but an occasion of wishful thinking. The OP gave some pretty good examples of making bad choices and expecting good results.
    Can folks surprise you? Yup, that's why con artists are successful. But I would remind you of the title, (and the premise), of an old W.C. Fields short movie; "You can't cheat an honest man". Cons work because there is a bit of larceny in human nature. Not a harsh judgment, just an honest observation of human nature.

    3. "My people".
    Stereotyping and prejudice have been given a bad name by the "P.C." crowd, but stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason... and we all operate with prejudices or predispositions every day of our lives.

    There is an old saying; "birds of a feather flock together", or, if you are of a more religious bent: "For every tree is known by his own fruit. For of thorns men do not gather figs, nor of a bramble bush gather they grapes." (Luke 6:44).

    Most "preppers" have become alert to that small quiet voice, (some call it conscience... some call it the "survival instinct"), that whispers in your ear; "This guy ain't right", or "There's something 'off-center' going on around here".

    In "real life" it ain't rocket science to figure out who you are comfortable with and who causes your B.S. detector to itch.

    4. "saying 'no good deed goes unpunished is an excuse for selfishness... the arrogance in this post really turns me off'".

    Self-preservation, (or selfishness, if you prefer), is the underlying engine that drives us to be preppers. You cannot preserve your loved ones if through making bad choices you are no longer alive. Your preparing for the coming food scarcity will have no value if through making poor decisions your cache has been taken from you. Stupid should hurt...badly.

    Darwin called it "Natural selection", most of us call it survival of the fittest. Whatever you call it, Forrest Gump's momma had it right: "Stupid is as stupid does."

    Regarding the responders perception of "arrogance" on the part of the OP, I can only share that sometimes the style of the OP feels "prickly" to me and upon further inspection find that it is because I see a less that acceptable trait that "I" need to work on in my own personality.

    SurviveNThrive will probably never have a future in the diplomatic corps, but he/she bluntly tells it like it is. It may be uncomfortable to see it on the board, (you cannot convey the subtle nuances of communication we come to expect in face-to-face communication on line), but although I don't always agree with everything the OP writes, I always learn something... sometimes about the subject being discussed... and sometimes about myself.

    A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.
    --Proverbs 27:12
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2010
  8. Tirediron

    Tirediron RockyMountainCanadian

    There is a lot of truth to most of the "rules"
    For the most part every person needs to learn to accept responsibility for what happens, sometimes it is really hard,but in the end it is the only way to take the lesson and move on.
    Helping the (to use Blob's term) gibs me dat people seems to only enable the gibs me dat mind set.
    Balance is the key to existance , if you can achieve the "be", not the"be good" or the "be bad" things will prolly work out
    I spent a lot of my early life being a "resque ranger" always trying to help people out, and thru emperical data learned that rule No. 1 applies more often than not.
    Selfless acts on the other hand seem to work out well. helping a stranger on the road, opening a door , just generally being nice.
    (People don't really expect me to be nice from my appearance, I kind of look like a "stereotype biker" I wear a full beard, muscular build, "beer"gut (thanks in part to food intolerances over the years )no tats.

    People do put them selves in dangerous places and don't watch their surroundings

    I would expect that most on this forum if they were to stand back and honestly look at themselves have acheived a close proximity to the "be" state.
    In the "be" one can make decisions about what is best for them and theirs, in a SHTF situation that maybe the use of deadly force on those who would cross the "line"

    The fluffy namby pamby world that socialists like to make up is usually just a way to gain control.

  9. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    Overall, what SNT wrote is an astute assessment of behavior. I've had all of those things happen in my life. The first one with neighbors and friends, and I do get tired of helping when asked, then when they get their problems sorted out, somehow I'm to blame.

    The human element comes in, for some of us, especially when it's family members or loved ones. I have a daughter who made a dumb choice in a boyfriend. The more we tried to talk to her about him, the more she shut us out. Finally I just told her if she ever needed me, I'd come. And when it was clear to me that he was about to break it off with her, I suggested she start letting me pick upsome of her things, stuff she didn't need on a daily basis. She agreed it was ending but said "Oh, he'd always let me back in to get my stuff".

    You guessed it. We had to fight to get her stuff, we had to call the police, and she never got some of it back, some of which was sentimental from her childhood.

    She knew THEN that I had been right. She was hurting enough as it was. What would I have gained by telling her how stupid she was? Or that "I told you so". She already knew it. Did I eliminate her from my life? No. She's my daughter, for better or worse.

    Sometimes we make "informed" choices and later find out people or things aren't quite what we thought. I have many regrets. Some came about by jumping into things but some came about through no fault of my own.

    There are some who prefer to focus on the mistakes people have made or anything negative, and don't give credit for the good. I never write someone off over a few dumb choices or personality quirks. I may not involve myself much with them. But none of us are perfect and at some point we may need them.

    But I'd definitely be careful about allowing them into your inner circle. Never be too sure you know anyone thoroughly. People wil surprise you. Especially in a time like post-SHTF. We know there will be violence and fear, but it may come from those you thought you trusted.
  10. SurviveNthrive

    SurviveNthrive a dude

    I'm a straight shooter. We don't need to waste our time on platitudes that are deceptive and don't have any merit while preparing. This is about one perspective, one that works for me, and one that works for others who can accept the world as it is.

    Let's see...

    So, you've never made a mistake? Never been surprised by the actions of another person who you thought you knew well?

    This is in regards to 'she picked him' or 'he picked her'. No, I most certainly didn't make any of the huge mistakes I am talking about. This is about choices and responsibility. If a person picks a bad person to be with, that's no one else's responsibility, it's that person's poor choice. Because I considered relationships serious I limited mistakes, missed out on some fun but realized some people aren't wise choices as spouses.

    I have is when someone who hooks up with someone who everyone else saw as either abusive or cheating is 'surprised' by that person when every sign was there, family and friends warned that person and everything but a neon sign flashing over the person's head saying 'abuser' or 'cheater' is there as a warning.

    Surprised by the actions of another person I knew well, and was close enough to be in a relationship with? Heck no! This is the most important decision a person makes when they're young, and it's going to affect their own future, possible children, family, reputation, and honor so it's a heavy decision. It's not a matter of just having sex with a person if a person is cautious. Morality doesn't even have to enter into it. As a young man, I looked for a wife, not someone to screw. My female relatives looked for husbands and got married to decent, non abusive, hard working guys. I married a wonderful woman who is still a wonderful woman. I didn't 'hook up' with a few equally incredible women because I saw potential problems beyond the incredible fun.

    For those who claim to be negatively surprised? What was the criteria for selection of a spouse before jumping into the sack and opening one's life to that person?

    I betcha they weren't all that detailed or thought out and you picked him!

    Once a person realizes they got themselves into the situation and DOES blame themselves, instead of accepting 'it's not your fault', then they can become empowered and actually rule their own lives.

    And that "not MY people" thing - how well do you know each and every one of your neighbors? How, exactly, are you picking "MY people"?

    My people are the ones like me who work, don't commit crimes, take care of their children and relatives, have values. Yes, those are who I associate with. When someone isn't like that, I stay away from them. This comes down to social-cultural issues. In someone related wants to be a bad boy, he better understand what it is to be a lone wolf, because you don't disgrace the family. My children saw that with both sides, if criminals aren't supported and facilitated, and there's a notion of 'honor' on one side and 'honor' and 'face' on the other, guess what? It works well. Those families that back thugs, rapists, gang bangers, and such are often dismayed and perplexed on how several of their children turn out so bad, when they've been so 'supportive'. There's a difference between support and facilitation.

    No, thugs in the street are not my people. They're not part of my society, I am proud to say I'm not like that. Anyone who can't say that, is one of those I gladly avoid in my personal life. If a person can't look at a group of scum and say 'not my people' then, well, you just might be one of them and if you can't distinguish those who aren't worth being around from those who are, you're definitely among those who are 'not my people.'

    While I agree that people are not all nice, that we can't save everybody (nor should we, necessarily), that we need to prepare for bad things happening (including an appropriate stash of weapons and ammo), should have basic situational awareness and not be overly trusting, etc - BUT I really get sick of the self-righteous attitude.

    It's self righteous not to be a criminal and not associate with them?

    That's a really, really warped view. 'sick' of the self-righteous attitude of someone who commits no crimes, does no harm and makes careful decisions, but accepting and forgiving of unnecessary 'mistakes'?

    Self righteous or realistic? I'm not a criminal. I don't associate with them. Heaven forbid if a friend or a family member becomes a loathesome criminal, then he is going to be kicked to the curb.

    And saying that no good deed goes unpunished is basically an excuse to be selfish.

    Hardly, I mention that we still do things anyway, even if we know it's going to blow back on us. I've still 'rescued' the abused woman who rushed back to her abuser. I'll still do other things, provide food for the food bank and have people there complain because they want Campbells soup instead of store brand, when that's what I'm eating. Why in the world would that person posting see that concept as an excuse? Is that the way she or he operates?

    Exercising some basic situational awareness / good judgement is generally sufficient in 'normal' times. I actually agree with some of the underlying thoughts / premises, but the arrogance in this post really turns me off.

    Confidence in one's beliefs and operating on them isn't arrogance, except to a person without the same level of certainty.
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2010
  11. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    SNT, just wondering...do you have kids?
  12. PopPop

    PopPop Well-Known Member

    I think I know where SNT is coming from. I also eliminate as much of the destructive side from my life. I am carefull about my associations and I do not think this makes me haughty. I just refuse to enable desructive behavior. In my own family I have witnessed almost all of the sins. I forgive as I wish to be forgiven, but I do not ignore or enable. I agree that we as asociety do not recognize the weight of our decisions. Marriage and Divorce being a good example. People marry for sex and then destroy a family for new or better sex. Families are destroyed for money, by drugs and alchohol and gambeling. All of these things are the result of a society that does not value the family. I do not accept the new definitions of family, they cannot be relied upon to produce generations of success. As for the good deeds, doing the right thing will always be the right thing to do. Charity that is pure and not coerced is always good. Charity will not always be rewarded and the reward should not be the goal. Forgiveness has little value for the transgressor, yet delivers peace to offended. Love will have you reach out a hand of help, that might often be slapped but will eventually save a valuable human being. These foundations of our American society have been weakened by many things. As a prepper, we prep for our family and one other. We do not know who that family is but when the time comes they will be right there. Its is just how we are. We have been bitten, HARD but we just go on and try harder the next time. I gues I just think that we all be better off if we rediscover that which is good inside each of us and cultivate and propigate that good. If we allow the tradional family to die the republic will perish. If we allow Charity to die the entitlement will replace it. And when we stop doing the right thing just because it is the right thing to do, Well then we have become them
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2010
  13. pdx210

    pdx210 Well-Known Member

    Thats not just money well spent its an investment in your own future!

    I agree with SNT

    Speaking of that, This is time of year when i hear the endless news reports about the poor people at the mall that take their packages to their car throw them in the back seat and go back in to shop only to come back out and find someone has done a smash and grab and taken their goodies that where left out in plain sight.
  14. Harsh or realist

    Harsh realists die of old age. Eat good during hard times and pull the trigger when they should..not bleed all over cause they didn't. Don't lend money give it to worthy causes. I'm often accused of being a hard hearted old man.How else do we survive in this world over 60 years..not by being a soft touch nor stupid.
    Buried a lot of the those. I don't know how many times I have offered good parental advice to be ignored and then later on told gee dad shoulda listened to you..you were right..I won't repeat what my reply was :D Cause you see I am a hard hearted old unrepeatable..if that's what situations call for.
    The hardest test any man can face is "do I shoot this dog or not"..and in just about that long..he got bullet holes in himself..it's a get tough or die world..while still retaining ones humanity.
    During times of anarchy nice guys finish dead sooner than later. We call our selves civilized human beings..might be true of me or thee, not all of us.
    Knowing the difference instinctively is a skill that comes with age and experience.. either listen to the old boys who know or go kill yourself some where else..not bringing that on me or mine. It's true as God.. the thoughtlessness of youth cannot survive the treachery of old age..thats exactly what kills thousands of beautiful young beings every day. Unrealistic ideals and foolishness.
    I just wonder who is really arrogant and pompous here. Same silly attitudes of the bleating lawn grass eaters. I used to brag about not raising any fools.:D but their mother sure by Dad did ! :2thumb:
    My world was not your world. I'm native American, from Canada, a place not known as a wild wild western culture..got news..is so..at 13 two red necks tried to murder me and my brother and mother..being a military brat is just one other factor that made a difference..I didn't wait to get shot I shot back and being a crack shooter from hours at the rifle range every day..those two losers were lucky I was hunting chickens not moose..had I had my 303 that day the bullets I was directing at the middle of their foreheads would have arrived there..my 22 shorts didn't..so one got a bullet hole in his upper left groin and the other got a bullet hole in his right butt cheek..:D their car was bearing several more bullet holes..and I did not hear or see them or have any problems what so ever from it. I know if I had not shot back they would have killed us for sport. Welcome to red neck Alberta.,50 years here has been a real education about just how sick some people can be, and hateful. Thats what makes the difference in survival or war..not gettin shot thinkin about what to do..think about it after you done it..:D
    We here to learn how to get shot or learn how to survive while not endangering everyone else being foolishly idealistic in a war zone. Rather straight talkers and straight shooters at my back than some bumbling panty waists. We're ready. Born ready. :beercheer:

  15. wildone_uk

    wildone_uk Active Member

    my motto is no one and nothing comes befor the safety and security of my family and i,
    i am with surviveNthrive on this,inevitably when you do a good turn for someone it comes around to bite in the ***,and butt is so sore
  16. kyfarmer

    kyfarmer Well-Known Member

    Family first and no i will not hand out peroid. To many neede and not enough, fact feed one and have a 1,000 at your door. You want to do that to your family, be my guest not me. They have had as much warning as anybody else has. Another prepper stuck in between ok, maybe but a system would have to be set up to know who you were.
  17. lotsoflead

    lotsoflead Well-Known Member

    NO. I think it's $50. they had better pay me and then never see me again.
  18. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    Brings to mind a picture of scrooge, alone, surrounded by his money/treasure/preps.

    I'll do what I can to have preps, take care of and protect our family, and be careful who I trust.

    But in the end, if the world was so harsh that there was no quality of life; if all we knew was fear and our existence centered around that fear and protecing our "stuff", why would I care if I survived?

    My preps aren't all about me. They're a legacy for my kids and grandkids. They are what makes surviving worth worrying about. Dying at an old age is only one of the possibilities.

    Prepping aside, I've always felt I'd rather be out there living life to the fullest and doing the things I want to do, than to be home, huddled in my house, scared I'd get lost in the backcountry backpacking, killed on one of my cross-country bicycle trips, or any other 'silly' notion of danger in today's world.

    How many of you are out there living even in today's world, let alone the more dangerous and violent world that could come?
  19. SaskBound

    SaskBound Well-Known Member

    I am with you, GS. It is easy to get paranoid and caught up in all sorts of perceived 'danger', but when I actually get 'out there' and live in the world, I find that, for the most part, people are kind, and not out to get you. For the most part, people want the same sorts of things - enough to eat, a better future for their kids, that sort of thing.

    Being open to the possibility that not everyone is out to get you is NOT THE SAME as being a 'pantywaist' or pushover. You can be cautious and self-assured without being unfriendly of downright mean. There is a saying about being kind to everyone you meet, but having a plan to kill them first. I like that sentiment. It allows for self-defense if necessary, but positive interactions if it isn't.

    I also think that good people can still run into hard times, or make mistakes. While I'm not out running around announcing all my preps, or handing out money for no-account acquaintances to go buy more drugs and booze (I don't have those sorts of acquaintances, thanks), I have been known to send bags of groceries to a colleague of my husband who has been laid off and has little ones to feed. I have been known to send a bus ticket to a sibling who was having a hard time of things and just needed to spend a bit of time with family. Or paid the deductible on someone's insurance when they got in a car wreck and couldn't pay it themselves, but needed the car for work. A hand up is not the same as enabling. Thing is, I never expected to be paid back, and I never expected fawning gratitude, either. Hasn't bit me in the *** yet. In fact, some of those people have gone on to help me out in very unexpected (and incredibly appreciated) ways, years later.

    Again, I do actually agree with the majority of SNT's ideas, but really get turned off by the way they're presented sometimes. In the end it doesn't make much difference to me, but I'd hate to see folks who are new to prepping / survivalism get turned off and leave because they are repeatedly told they have to be cold and tough and heartless to be a 'real' prepper.
  20. gypsysue

    gypsysue The wanderer

    You summed it all up nicely.

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