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Discussion Starter · #81 ·
Part of what I needed to heal was for folks to not "need " anything from me for a bit when I first meet them. And like my dog, to ignore me while i got comfy in their company. When I could observe the mettle of the man I could venture into small talk. The more observations I made about someone the more trust I built. An each time trust was established, I waited for the other shoe to drop..and analyzed the heck out of each action...almost until I made my fears come true. Then the abuse was validated. Then I had to train my brain to stop my own behavior or at least to shut up until I could see if it played out per usual. Like I said, years... Fast forward to last year or so and figured I had it downpat..and now I am seeing it firsthand working in a positive and productive relationship that I am relaxing into quite nicely. You have to get strong enough to handle risk..IMHO
 

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I invented the internet. :rofl:
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If I were single I'd have no problem with the way you live. I currently don't leave the house except once a week for Roo's sake. If I had things my way I'd be in the deep woods away from all people except my family.
And what would K think about such a life style?
 

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There is a place in Hell for me...the THRONE.
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And what would K think about such a life style?
I think he'd get cabin fever and want to go in to town every chance he got. He is a bit more social than I am but then I think it is part of his up bringing to make a big show of things in front of strangers all the time.
 

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Discussion Starter · #84 ·
Well he is here staying at my compound, whole family gonna meet him this weekend. Saturday going to a wake with him, all his friends and family will be there. Trial by fire,..
 

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I really don't understand this post, a lot of the threads on this board are about getting significant others on board with prepping, more important in my opinion than musical interests, although if people don't have much in common what would they build a relationship on.
I think it's more important to find someone generally compatible. You can handle the issue of prepping at a later date. I've been married for 20 years. If something happened to my wife I'd look for the next one at church. Not through a prepper group.
 

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I think it's more important to find someone generally compatible. You can handle the issue of prepping at a later date. I've been married for 20 years. If something happened to my wife I'd look for the next one at church. Not through a prepper group.
Similar religious views are high on my priority list as well. I just made sure she was a prepper too! ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #88 ·
Ok, we have decided this is a committed relationship this weekend he stayed here with my family, cooked up a humdinger meal for my mom's birthday, sat at the firepit with the family...so I introduced him to my preps. He was interested..impressed that I take care of my own this way... we discussed him getting his family here if shtf. He agreed tentatively as he has quite a set-up himself at his place. We have a 65 mile distance between us..he is city, i am country.I dont know how this will eventually work, but we practice honesty every minute in our conversations, and talk out our issues faiyhfully ...here I go folks..still plan a year or more before we have to decide changing arrangements..but he is building me a shooting range and outdoor kitchen
 

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RockyMountainCanadian
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Glad that this is working out for you so far, communication is key to a long lasting relationship, (in 2 months my wife and I will be celebrating 29 years)
We try to discuss things, sometimes those discussions get heated, we have learned that we don't have to be in 100% agreement about everything for life to go on, We also find that ideas that we are not in 100% agreement with at first often end up being better than one we both think are great.
As long as neither of you think that you need to change the other too much you should do well, A look at things from a different prospective can really help
 

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Discussion Starter · #90 ·
Thanks Tirediron..congratulations on 29 years !!! We communicate so well its eerie. Any issues are discussed, then we break,for a day or 2 to digest what was said, then revisit topic to decide on a plan of action. So far, honesty and full disclosure are working well for us. And, so far...neither of us seems to want to change anything in the other. We are happy with ourselves just like we are..it's what attracted us in the first place..why change a good thing
 

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Discussion Starter · #92 ·
We agree...or we disagree but agree we can live with the answer..or we keep talking until we reach an understanding that is comfortable to us both
 

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Discussion Starter · #95 ·
Update: all going well...I learned something about myself..a few things actually..being a strong woman takes a strong man to be beside me.(I have that now) but also being strong with someone equally strong means I don't have to be so "hard". I can let myself be a soft girl sometimes...cuz he likes to "take care of something for me". I just lost a DEAR uncle..5 YEARS older than me..he just let me cry it out and snot all over him..made me and him feel better...I know..cheesy..sorry
 

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Update: all going well...I learned something about myself..a few things actually..being a strong woman takes a strong man to be beside me.(I have that now) but also being strong with someone equally strong means I don't have to be so "hard". I can let myself be a soft girl sometimes...cuz he likes to "take care of something for me". I just lost a DEAR uncle..5 YEARS older than me..he just let me cry it out and snot all over him..made me and him feel better...I know..cheesy..sorry
Sorry about what? ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #98 ·
Well..update..I am moving in with him this winter...he is totally on-board with my preps! And my dog and family! Thank you all for helping me on this journey!
 

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Well..update..I am moving in with him this winter...he is totally on-board with my preps! And my dog and family! Thank you all for helping me on this journey!
As Mr. Spock would say: "May you live long and prosper". We all wish you the best and are happy for you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #100 ·
Well, 3.5 years after asking Y'ALL about dating, telling you about this guy and how it was all going well...we are getting married in June. And the prepping stuff has unfolded wonderfully. We are both now part of the MRC (medical reserve Corp) run by the disaster medicine project, we are prepping two homes,(never ends.lol) and decided it all works. Thanks to the many that listened to my tales awhile back
 
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