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Mental Prep for Isolation


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Old 04-29-2017, 12:46 AM   #71
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IMO these places only prove how barbaric and uncivilized we have become.

I've seen a few and none of waiting fro God looked happy to me.
There are many different levels of Assisted Living / Retirement facilities. The two facilities I worked at required millionaire financial status to join. The care was excellent and the residents were well cared for, with that being said, family is still the best medicine. It the resident is too ill for family, then they should at least visit often.

JMHO


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Old 04-29-2017, 01:14 AM   #72
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There are many different levels of Assisted Living / Retirement facilities. The two facilities I worked at required millionaire financial status to join. The care was excellent and the residents were well cared for, with that being said, family is still the best medicine. It the resident is too ill for family, then they should at least visit often. JMHO
Good point regarding the different "levels" of facilities. Those at the "bottom" level are in deep doo-doo. Half those places, and there has been a lot of publicity about this, just keep everybody drugged up (tranquilized) so they aren't a "bother" to the staff. And the quality of the staff leaves MUCH to be desired.

At the "high" end, the places are like country clubs, the staff is top notch, and there is plenty for the "clients" to do....hell, they even take them on "field trips" to museums, amusement parks, etc.

WORLD of difference between the two! There are many arguments for "subsidies" toward the "bottom end" - - but the primary argument is simply the lack of "quality care, and qualified staff." I am of two minds about this, as I do believe people should prepare for their own future, whatever that future may drop in your lap. I do understand, however, that is not always possible....completely unforeseen events do pop up, and that should NOT mean you get left to vegetate at the hands of some apathetic staff who could care less what happens to YOU as long as they keep getting their paycheck every two weeks. My thinking is that some concerned citizens should form an Ombudsman Group in every city where these substandard facilities are located, document everything as best they can, and SUE THE HELL OUT OF THE OWNERS/DIRECTORS of these facilities, while ALSO coordinating things with the LOCAL D.A. to prosecute them for "elderly abuse, negligence," and whatever else they can come up with under state law.

I have no personal experience with any of these facilities, but an Uncle stuck his wife in one, and evidently it was not one of the better ones. Dad "rescued" her, got a cousin to take her in, and she perked right up once she was off the "medications" they had her loaded up with....she lived for several years after that. From what I've heard over the years since, I doubt she'd have lived for long in the "facility." I can easily sympathize with those on "rescue missions" because some OTHER relative just doesn't "give a s43t," or is trying to "shear the sheep," so to speak. Sometimes "relatives" can be your worst nightmare come true.


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Old 04-29-2017, 11:31 AM   #73
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Had a chance to pick up long term care insurance when we retired. We pay each month but we don't have to worry about winding up in one of the lower level places.

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Old 04-29-2017, 11:58 AM   #74
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Leaving early tomorrow morning for the rescue mission. Then, getting a key from the real estate lady that is selling mom's trailer. Then staying there a couple days to let mom decide what to do with 84 yrs of stuff. Avoiding my sister that lives in the same trailer park. Bring husband with me so he can just stand there, and maybe there won't be so much blood.
Have no idea how to move mom's stuff. Moving vans take weeks. Have no idea how much stuff she wants to take.
So, today is band competition for the twins. Then moving grandson up to our loft upstairs, emptying his room for my mom.
Youngest daughter pointed out that we'll have 4 generations in the house. Very cool.

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Old 04-29-2017, 04:01 PM   #75
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Leaving early tomorrow morning for the rescue mission. Then, getting a key from the real estate lady that is selling mom's trailer. Then staying there a couple days to let mom decide what to do with 84 yrs of stuff. Avoiding my sister that lives in the same trailer park. Bring husband with me so he can just stand there, and maybe there won't be so much blood. Have no idea how to move mom's stuff. Moving vans take weeks. Have no idea how much stuff she wants to take.
So, today is band competition for the twins. Then moving grandson up to our loft upstairs, emptying his room for my mom.
Youngest daughter pointed out that we'll have 4 generations in the house. Very cool.
If you have a pickup or SUV, probably a large U-Haul trailer would be your best bet. Or search locally for a small, private, outfit that can do it a lot quicker than trying to set up a regular "moving van" op. When Mom died, I had the pleasure of cleaning out the house.....closet upon closet filled with "$19.95 TV sales items," MOST of which were still "in the box(es!)" Huge yard sale....no way was I saving all THAT!

Good luck!!
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Old 04-29-2017, 04:49 PM   #76
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Ohh...you all are newlyweds. Ha.
I married the love of my life almost 34 years ago. We met when I was 17, and married when I was 21. He is 9 years older. One of our daughters (age 24) was dating young men her age, never was working out. Is dating (and shacking up with) one who is 10 yrs older. Seems to be working well, although I'm not thrilled with the shacking up part. He is a very nice man and works hard, and doesn't play video games or act like a childish idiot.
got you beat . hubby and snagged each other 36 years ago and only one way out . he is the love of my life and always will be.
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Old 04-29-2017, 06:08 PM   #77
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You might want to consider want to consider renting a U-haul truck. Hubby can drive back while you take Mom home on the plane to save her the extended travel time. The airlines will have wheelchairs available if you let them know ahead.

A moving company will save your back but so will a couple of young kids. Perhaps Mom has some friends or the church can recommend someone.


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Old 04-29-2017, 06:53 PM   #78
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Hubby's health is crap. And he works more than full time. Suggested the UHaul, but don't know who would drive it.


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Old 04-29-2017, 09:27 PM   #79
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Good luck AmishHeart. Family fights can be the worst. Maybe put the stuff mom wants in storage until movers can get to it. Donate the rest to someone who will pick it up.


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Old 04-30-2017, 03:35 AM   #80
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Hubby's health is crap. And he works more than full time. Suggested the UHaul, but don't know who would drive it.
When I moved from Oregon to Arizona, Wife and I packed / boxed our stuff. Hired a couple of moving guys to load truck. Got to Arizona, another bunch of moving guys unloaded and carried into apartment (upstairs). Easiest move I ever made. If the load can be kept down, a small truck /van could handle the load and you and your mom could drive back. Slow easy drives - no marathons.

You could hire auction company to sell the stuff not wanted. They will tag, display and collect the monies. They take a big cut but fast and simple. Just some idea's. Keeping my fingers crossed and hoping all goes well.


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